Sandy Bottom(s)

Today’s story involves a couple of guys that I picked up at the start of my day.  But first, let me go back a few steps and explain how I begin most of my shifts.

When I head out, if it’s before 8pm then I always go get a car wash and vacuum everything out.  Front, back, and trunk.  I wipe down the seats with lemon cleaner wipes and make sure everything’s nice and clean.  If I think that I’m not going to make it out before 8pm (that’s when the car wash closes), then I will do it at the end of my shift so either way, at the beginning the Jeep is nice and cleaned.

On this particular day, I went out early because there was a Kesha / Macklemore concert downtown so I wanted to catch some of the rides from that.  So i did my cleaning and started my shift.  Picked up a rider, nothing special, dropped them off.  Then I get a notification for a rider out by 28th and Wilson on Butterworth.  So i head over that way from across town and I get to where the destination was.  There’s absolutely nothing there except grass and treas on one side and the Grand River on the other.  Further ahead is the entrance for picnic area of Johnson Park so I figured maybe that’s where they are.  So I pull into there, drive around the parking lot a few times and nobody’s waving me down or yelling.  At this point it’s been about 5 minutes that I’ve “Arrived” at the location so I drive back to where the pin drop was and there’s still nobody there.  No cars on the side of the road, no people walking, nothing.  So finally I get a call from them and he’s like ya I saw you turn in but I was further down the road walking away.  At this point I’m already a bit irritated and then he tells me he’s walking away vs actually trying to get to me especially since he’s not where he said he was going to be.  So I drive further down the road and come up to find these two guys carrying fishing equipment and a blow up boat.  One has no shirt on, and the other just looks shady.  They load their stuff into the back and get in, and then proceed to tell me that even though their destination is one place, they’ve got to go around the corner to these bushes to get a box that they left with their “stuff” in it.

At this point there’s red flags flying everywhere because I’m trying to figure out what’s going on and why were going to some bushes to get some random box.  I’m thinking it’s bright out and it’s a busy enough road so are they really gonna try to rob me or something here, or what’s going on.  But I proceed and we go to the bushes and sure enough the one guy hops out and grabs the box that the inflatable boat came in.  I couldn’t tell what was inside of it so I was still nervous.   At this point I’m starting to notice the smell that these two guys are emanating.  They stink like they swam in the worst of the grand river on top of BO.  I also notice that the smell is getting exponentially worse.  So even though I’ve got the AC on I roll down the window and proceed forward.  We get out to Lake Michigan Drive and one of the guys decides this is where he want to get out.  Right in front of a Sheriff truck.  I almost poop myself because I’m sure I’m about to get the wrath of the cops for letting this guy out on the side of the road of a busy intersection but nothing happens.  I continue crossing Lake Michigan and drop the other guy off at some 200k+ house and he thanks me and says he’ll give me a nice tip (which as of this writing still hasn’t happened).  He gets out, unloads all of his junk and shuts the door and for some reason, even though I have a screen that shows my backup view, I decided to turn around and look out the back window the old fashioned way.  That’s when I saw it.

The back seat looks like several small children decided to roll around in sand at the beach and then climb into my Jeep.  There was sand everywhere.  Floor, doors, seats, headrests, and even the windows.  On top of that, the seats were all wet because apparently they decided not to bring towels and / or use them.  So I had to stop working and go to the car wash and re clean my car.  I can’t say how thankful I am that I keep the lemon wipes in the trunk because I had to use several of them to get the smell off the seats after I spent 20 minutes getting all the sand out.

Two Stars for him.

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